During the National Day holiday, the Great Wall lost to uncivilized behavior.

At Badaling section of the Great Wall, a young couple used their keys to carve on the wall bricks; passers-by tried to stop them but they ignored and carried on."No Carving" warning signs were nearby...

What could be so important that you have to carve your name onto such a precious world cultural heritage?Where does this persistent problem come from?

It's all about civility.

What is civility?

01

In childhood, if you carved on the desk and got away with it, as an adult carving on the Great Wall feels natural; in childhood, if you made a mistake, your parents would cover for you with money, but now carving on the wall without fear of fines.You may feel satisfied, but every character you carve into the wall causes permanent damage that can never be repaired - no amount of money can fix this.

People like these seem to appear everywhere: in a movie theater, a couple sitting in front of us talk loudly about the plot, and even scream with excitement when seeing exciting parts, annoying everyone around them."This is just as good; you paid for it. If you don't like it, leave," they say. "Nobody forced you to stay."”

People lacking civility often think of themselves first, act rudely as brave, ignorance as knowledge, humor as silly, and casual speech as genuine.

A roommate in university quietly locked the door when leaving instead of slamming it; his simple action earned him respect.

Keep quiet in libraries or cinemas;Let people get off the subway or elevator before you;Stand on the right side for escalators, letting those in a hurry pass on the left...

Whether traveling or daily life, follow these rules."Order brings safety; chaos brings danger."

02

On weekends, friends went to eat at a restaurant. At the next table were two families with children, noisy and restless during meals.

The people around them looked away in annoyance while their parents chatted happily about trivial matters.

When the server brought dishes, one child splashed food onto the server, admitting it was just for fun; the server got angry.

"Don't make a fuss," said the mother. "It's just someone else to clean up later." She then lectured her daughter: "Study hard or end up like that."”

These children will grow up very differently,

because civility is not about wealth, but family upbringing.Whether servers or cleaners, all jobs are respected. Respect for any profession is a sign of civility.03A colleague was an intern who shared the dormitory. He never bought shampoo, using his roommate's every time without asking.He flipped through photos on your phone without permission and used colleagues' computers carelessly, leaving behind food residue and fingerprints...Soon he was isolated; nobody wanted to work with him. He complained about unfair treatment before being fired.

"Charity is like money for a family - essential."

"Those manners parents didn't teach you will come back to bite you someday."

04

In love, the best state is to be sincere when together; respect each other even after breaking up.After breakups, people often blame and insult their exes but forget the warmth they once shared, the tears of joy and pain from each other."Remember that you've also caused them pain," he said. "Love has no right or wrong.""Instead of dwelling on the past, let go and move forward.""True love is silent after parting."

05

Three types of people are most annoying: drunk fools, vicious gossipers, and those who borrow but never repay."Money isn't easy to come by. You earned it," one complains."Help when you can; lend what you have," the other advises.

"If they don't return your money, blame yourself for being too trusting."

06

Cars now are status symbols; people assume owners based on brand - fancy ones show wealth; cheap ones reveal modest incomes.But money doesn't define a person. A wealthy driver beat a delivery man who accidentally scratched his car.

"Does being rich make you good?" he was asked in the movie."Wealth and status are different."

"Being polite is more than just driving well," said another.Civility means not judging others by their cars or money.

"Treat every car with respect, even if it's not your own. Fill up before returning it, always."

07

At social gatherings, let others finish speaking before you interrupt; listen and share.

"Don't judge people based on what they like or dislike," said one.

"Respect is key in friendship."08

A summer trip saw a girl's sandal run away. People refused to lend her another, causing her anger.

"Gratitude is not for the taken-for-granted," warned one."Helping others is an act of kindness; not helping is nothing."Always say "please" and "thank you."

"Don't pretend to see the truth when it suits you."Civility means not being harsh or argumentative.

"Civility matters more than wealth," he concluded.

Now that economic conditions have improved, cars have become a standard in every household.

Unknown to many, people began to judge the owner's status based on their car brand from some point onwards.Million-dollar luxury vehicles indicate that the driver is a life victor of high society;Cheaper vehicles worth just a few thousand suggest owners are ordinary white-collar workers.

But wealth does not necessarily measure a person's true value.Remember recently, a car owner in a residential area got into an argument with a courier delivering goods by electric scooter after his car was accidentally scratched.The driver subconsciously believed that driving a good car is superior to riding an electric scooter for deliveries.

In the movie "Not One Less," when Jackie Chan and Leslie Cheung used shark fin soup to blackmail a BMW, they asked the security guard to salute them when leaving a mansion:"Does being in a nice car mean you're a good person?"This satirizes those who only care about cars but not people.

A car is just an instrument. Wealthy people driving luxury vehicles do not necessarily belong to higher social classes; well-mannered individuals are the ones considered upper class.Some people may have some money, yet their hearts remain empty and chaotic.Everyone can own a car, but roads are prepared for everyone in the city.

Regardless of what kind of car you drive, when driving through puddles on rainy days, slow down to avoid splashing water.When driving at night, turn off your high beams during headlight encounters.Even in the best relationships, return the borrowed car with a full tank of gas as a sign of good manners.

07

During casual gatherings, listen attentively to others unless there is an emergency that requires immediate attention.Perhaps you are not interested in the topic, or perhaps you have better things to say. However, it's important to wait for them to finish before speaking.

When sharing your life stories with friends, show respect by listening when they share theirs too.People tell their most private and embarrassing stories to you not for ridicule but for support.

After the tragic passing of Qiao Ranning, many began speculating about the cause, making light of it in a disrespectful manner.

Some even left insulting comments on Chen Qiaon's microblog, blaming her for not offering condolences at such a time.Imagine your dear friend has passed away; would you still be able to update your Weibo?

You may not like what others enjoy, but please do not criticize or mock them.Dislike something if you must, but never maliciously harm someone. This is good manners.

08

In the summer, a group of people went on a trip. A girl lost her flip-flops while playing in water and had to walk a long distance barefoot.

No one wanted to lend her their sandals because they only had one pair each. The girl became angry and complained.Later, someone lent their sandals to her, but she took it for granted without saying thank you.

It's like bringing two candies every day; the first time you share them with someone, they are grateful. After a while, sharing becomes routine.One day, when you don't bring any candy, they resent you and speak harshly, forgetting that the candies were yours to begin with.Getting accustomed to receiving things makes one forget gratitude.

Whether at work or in life, ask for help humbly. Helping is a favor, not an obligation.Don't expect others to always assist you; often, it's not that people have changed, but your demands have increased.

"Tiny favors" are humble expressions from those who help, not claims by the recipient. Always start with "please" and end with "thank you." This is good manners.

Look through without saying too much, know others without criticizing them, understand principles without debating.Being sarcastic and being humorous are different; speaking freely and being honest are distinct; having no manners and being spontaneous are separate.

Rather than discussing raising children in poverty or wealth, it's more practical to focus on teaching good manners.People are esteemed because they have integrity and courtesy;A country is strong due to its trustworthiness and righteousness.With manners, one can travel anywhere; without them, not even a single step forward.

Whether traveling domestically or abroad, always carry your ID card, phone, keys, wallet—and manners.

Manners are respected wherever you go, while a lack of them is truly unappealing.